I recently got a night guard to help me refrain from clenching my teeth while sleeping. Chronic jaw, neck, and shoulder pain had not been helped by some of the other interventions I tried. So the night guard was the next logical step. Four weeks into wearing it religiously every night I had gained some relief. However, the jaw pain was still there.

Fast forward to four weeks later… I’m back at the dentist’s office for a routine check up and cleaning. “The night guard has helped, I’m not experiencing as much pain as before, but still there is jaw pain”, I tell my dental hygienist as I lie back in the chair. She proceeds to tell me I might be clenching during the day too! Apparently it is really common in today’s desk dwelling culture, along with global feelings of stress, uncertainty, and productivity pressures, to be constantly contracting the jaw muscles and clenching the teeth. So much so that people are now wearing corrective mouth gear almost 24-7  to help remedy the problem.

In between her cleaning my mouth, I chuckled, “That’s kinda comical.” Instead of questioning and trying to address the root-source of the problem (i.e.: stress), we slap a band-aid (in this case, a mouth guard) on it. We look towards quick and immediate external fixes to cure longstanding and internal (personal) challenges.

About stress resilience

So that visit with my dental hygienist really got me thinking. Resilience, as defined by Merriam-Webster, is:

“an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change”

It brought me back to this TED Talk by Kelly McGonigal. Basically, she proposes that we need to change our relationship to stress instead of stressing about how to rid ourselves of it. Because removing stress completely from our lives is an impossible task. Subsequently, since viewing that talk a few years ago, I’ve changed my language regarding this topic from a theme of stress management to stress resilience.

But Michelle, you ask, what does this have to do with mouth guards and jaw pain? Well, maybe if we changed our relationship to stress, the jaw wouldn’t need a piece of molded acrylic to handle the weight of our anxieties and overwhelm all the time, day-and-night. Perhaps, if we:

• Become more aware of our stressors
• Meet them head on (with compassion)
• To understand how we usually react (physical, emotional or otherwise) to those stressors

Then, we might find new ways to effectively be with stress. In this way, the stress could be an opportunity to become more resilient.

An Embodied Response

When I reflected back on what could have been the stress that showed up for me as musculoskeletal pain, I realized it was felt pretty soon after I started back to school, after a 20+ year “hiatus” (more on that here). Clenching my teeth and contracting my fascial muscles was my embodied response to the many worries (and realities) of a major life change. Making that connection now has me considering the ways I can adapt to the challenges of being a mature student.

First, I’ve acknowledged that, although I made a good (for me) choice to become a student again, it’s natural for me to be stressed. Stress is inevitable, in this circumstance and in life. The question is:

How am I going to respond so that the stress does not take over? 

Bodies are amazing in so many ways. They have the ability to take on all kinds of stress and to bounce back from adversity. Also fascinating is that our bodies tell us when enough is enough. I’m choosing to heed the call of what my body needs:

• Do I need more rest?
• Does the jaw need some gentle movement, restorative yoga or self-massage?
• Do I need to do more conscious and relaxing breathing?
• Does my body need to move more vigorously (i.e.: running or swimming) so as to move the tension out?

I’m still using the mouth guard at night. My body still needs that support, which is totally ok. But I’d prefer not to wear a mouth guard during the day too! Instead, I want to:

• Practice being more connected to my body’s experience of stress
• Kindly acknowledge that stress is part of life but I don’t have to succumb to it completely
• Continue to use my movement practices as a tool for self-care and bouncing back from stressful moments

Any kind of physical pain is a signal to listen, instead of ignoring the pain altogether or putting a proverbial band-aid on it. Stress might be a way for us to build awareness, find strength and practice self-care.

The post Chronic Pain & Stress: A Gateway to Embodied Living appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

The Art of Self-Swaddling

What do you do though, if you want to be swaddled but don’t have anyone around to help you with the setup? Well, I’ve been experimenting lately with self-swaddling and I think I’ve found a technique that works pretty well! So, here’s a 5 minute video demo-ing how to swaddle yourself:

NOTE: This does require rolling the body and that movement pattern might not be suitable and/or available to everyone. Please refrain from trying this if you are recovering from an injury or if you have joint and/or mobility issues.

Michelle Pitman is the the founder and operator of Define Me Wellness. Michelle supports clients on their own path to well-being with specialities in healing body image, enhancing athletic performance and cultivating work-life balance. Click here to learn more about Michelle and her work.

The post Restorative Practice to Help with Anxiety: The Swaddle, Part II appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

A common dilemma with eating disorders (EDs) is the difficulty one can have in identifying and interpreting their emotions (the medical term for this is alexithymia). Again, it comes back to the mind-body disconnection that I spoke about in yesterday’s post.

Anxiety is also a common c0-occuring illness with EDs. It puts the nervous system into an “amped-up” state! When someone is experiencing anxiousness, it can feel debilitating and overwhelming. And not being able to tap into and know those feelings can be confusing, making it hard to figure out what is needed to self-soothe and self-regulate those feelings. So what is someone with and eating disorder to do when experience anxiety and/or a nervous system on overdrive? It’s in these situations leaning on a loved one might be helpful.

The role of caregiver

As a caregiver of someone struggling with an eating disorder or other mental health illness, it can be challenging to know what to do. But don’t minimize your role as supporter and nurturer. Sometimes the best thing you can offer is a safe place to be held and an opportunity for rest, without try to fix anything.

Are you familiar with the practice of swaddling? Swaddling is often part of the bedtime routine for infants. It is where a newborn is cocooned in a blanket. And it signals to the nervous system that it is time for rest.

Now I’ve been experimenting recently with using this practice for managing difficult feelings, especially for anxiety. And if you want to do something for your loved one in need of some down-regulating, you may want to try this…

Swaddling: It’s not just for babies

In the following video, I demonstrate with my friend Angela, how to swaddle and nurture an adult. But first, here are some suggested tips:

1. Take up space, as much as you need. I use my living room and push any furniture aside
2. Turn off phones and remove any other potential distractions (TV, pets, etc.)
3. Adjust lighting if possible (or use an eye pillow or folded hand towel placed over the eyes to shield from bright lights/the sun)
4. Explain what you will be doing, ask permission and stay with them the entire time
5. Allow some time for quiet but continue to ask them every few minutes how they are doing
6. Continue to remind them that you are there, either with a few kind words or hands gently placed at top of head, shoulder or feet
7. Keep with the swaddle 5 – 15 minutes max. Any longer than that has the potential to bring up feelings of overwhelm and claustrophobia (which is the opposite of what you are trying to accomplish)

While I and some of my clients have found this to be super relaxing and soothing… what works for some, might not work for others. We are all unique in our recovery journey. But if you think it might work for you, give it a try and let me know what you think.

Michelle Pitman is the founder and operator of Define Me Wellness. Most recently, Michelle has launched Under the Lilac Tree: a virtual program for eating disorder recovery and support. Click here to learn more about Michelle and her work.

The post #EDAW2017: A Restorative Practice to Help Your Loved One Manage Anxiety appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

Eating disorders are often coping strategies to manage difficult feelings and/or experiences. And behaviours such as starving, purging and self-criticism can trick us into thinking we are in control.  But, when someone is in the depths of an eating disorder, the connection between the mind and the body is muddled.

It can be scary to give up the ED behaviours (believe me, I know). It is especially difficult when we don’t have positive replacements for those harmful behaviours. So, what do we need to repair the mind-body connection and heal from EDs? Well, I believe self-awareness is a super important skill. And my favourite way to rebuild self-awareness is through a variety of slow, gentle movement and self-care practices .

Self-Massage for The Win!

Self massage is just one of the strategies I incorporate into my self-care and movement tool kit. My morning practice includes at least 5 minutes of self massage with therapy balls. I roll with them everyday.

The following video is a brief demo of a typical routine I use for the neck-jaw-face. I use Yoga Tune Up® therapy balls (the “Originals”). But you could also use lacrosse or tennis balls instead to get a similar effect. Practice along with me:

Facebook Live: Restorative Movement Class!

As Eating Disorders Awareness Week comes to a close, I’ll be hosting a Facebook Live class on Tuesday, February 7th. Explore restorative movement and gentle embodiment practices in the comfort of your home. Checkout the Define Me Wellness FB page for further details.

Michelle Pitman is the founder and operator of Define Me Wellness. Most recently, Michelle has launched Under the Lilac Tree: a virtual program for eating disorder recovery and support. Click here to learn more about Michelle and her work. 

The post #EDAW2017: From Disconnection to Awareness with Self Massage appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

A Full Day Dedicated to Women’s Health, Empowerment & Self-Care

Most of all, this is a day for connection and revitalizing your commitment to your well-being journey for 2017 and beyond.  It’s going to be refreshing and fun! And we hope you’ll join us.  As an extra incentive to get you registered….

It’s Contest Giveaway Time!

Part of our women’s health retreat involves a practice in self-massage.  And we’ll be using my go-to resources with the Yoga Tune Up® Therapy Balls.  Establishing a daily self-massage routine can help with:

• Relieving and eliminating pain
• Managing stress
• Enhancing the mind-body connection

Because I’m a big “ball-iever” in the power of self-care as health-care, I want you to be able to take what you learned home with you.  So, if you register by 11:59pm Monday, Jan 16th, your name will be entered into a draw to win a Yoga Tune Up® Therapy Balls kit.  Valued at almost $150, the winner will receive the following:

• Set of Originals, in netted tote
• 1 Alpha
• 1 Coregeous
• Plus, a private 1:1 customized “roll-it-out” session with me, Michelle

Another event (and giveaway) like this isn’t going to come along often! Sunday, January 22nd is going to be a fabulous day with a peaceful setting, delicious food and a room full of women celebrating and empowering one another.

To join us, simply follow this link for registration. This once a year event is only open to the first 20 registered.

The post Jan 22nd Retreat for Women’s Health, Empowerment & Self-Care! Agenda & Contest Giveaway!!! appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

Seems like the holidays are wrapping up and a new year is upon us.  It’s the best time to prioritize you and find simple ways to take good care of your whole self (read: mind, body, spirit).  That’s why I’m excited to be co-hosting this Nourished Body day-long retreat on January 22nd! Past participants say it’s introspective, inspiring, valuable and fun! And this year’s event promises to be all that and more.

Tucked away in a farm setting in Uxbridge, you’ll learn new and interesting practices around food, movement and health.  Here are just a few highlights…

Exploring an alternative to the diet and deprivation cycle

Our relationship with food can be complicated and frustrating.  But it shouldn’t be.  And it doesn’t have to be.  Kori Kostka, Registered Dietitian, will have you thinking differently about eating through:

1. Ditching the rules and restriction (or putting them aside, at least for one day)
2. Discovering ways to identify hunger and fullness cues
3. And putting theory into practice with a fully-catered mindful eating lunch

Restore your body and nervous systems through movement:

Since food and exercise go hand-in-hand when dieting, the usual approach to physical activity probably leaves us more disconnected from our bodies.  And just like with food, it doesn’t have to be this way.  Therefore, Michelle Pitman (that’s me!) will also have you thinking and relating to your body differently with:

1. Body sensing from a place of curiosity and no judgment
2. Self massage techniques for pain relief
3. Restorative yoga as a gentle and embodied experience

As a result of these movement practices, you will feel deep relaxation and a better understanding of your body’s needs.

Finally, discover how you can take charge of your health

It all comes together with a candid and kind conversation with Nurse Practitioner Claudia Mariano.  You will get the facts about the health concerns that matter most to you as a woman, from an expert.  And then learn what you can do to prevent, heal and thrive through:

1. Practicing mindfulness for women’s health, at various life stages
2. Discovering new tips for taking care of your skin
3. And, most importantly, determining how to get what you want out of life

Sunday, January 22nd is going to be a fabulous day with a peaceful setting, delicious food and a room full of women celebrating and empowering one another.  To join us, simply follow this link for registration.  And please sign up soon to avoid disappointment.  This once a year event is only open to the first 20 registered.

Women’s Wellness & Leadership Retreat
Eat, Play and Be Mindful

The post Women’s Wellness & Leadership 1 Day Retreat appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

• Frustrated that there isn’t one day where I wake up in the morning without feeling the pain
• Frustrated that I can’t turn my head without turning my whole torso when changing lanes while driving
• Frustrated that I am missing out on moving my body in ways that are challenging, yet enjoyable, for me
• Frustrated that I am not healing quick enough
• Frustrated that, ultimately, healing seems to be eluding me

I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be a complainer.  I realize that I am privileged to have access and financial means to be able to get help.  I also realize that my pain pales in comparison to those that live with chronic disease such as fibromyalgia, arthritis, etc., where pain is a constant teeter-totter of sensation with no known cure.  I don’t mean to minimize those experiences or suggest that with the “right” action plan, that pain can all but go away.  On the contrary…

We all, at some point in our lives, whether it be physical, mental, emotional or otherwise, experience pain in varying degrees.  Is it not intertwined with the human condition? I share this as a personal reflection of my well-being journey, as opposed to dictating a specific way (i.e.: my way) will work for you.  Anyway, back to the chiropractor visit…

So I asked my chiropractor “Do you have other patients whose bodies are stubborn, taking a long time to heal?”.  The tone in my question demonstrated my impatience.  I was agitated and angry that pain had it’s own agenda and I didn’t seem to have a say in the how, when or whether my body would heal.  I knew her answer would be yes but I wanted to feel validated that I wasn’t the only one who felt this way and that at some point I would feel better and could get on with things.

So we continued to talk about how the experience of pain and healing is so unique to each and every one of us.  It can also be a challenging and lengthy process.  Pain, it turns out, is so much more than just “x” issue caused by “y” pain.  I can’t remember the specifics of what she said but it had an impact on me.  In that moment I realized I was looking for a definitive answer when there wasn’t one – a prescription, a training plan, a project map, a course of action that would rid me of my discomfort.  A-ha!!! That was my shifting moment! Maybe I needed to sit with the discomfort, listen and dialogue with my body.  Maybe I needed to let go of the quest for perfect healing and meet my body as it was, with a dose of curiosity, self-acceptance and compassion.

I recently read this short book “Pain Is Really Strange” by Steven Haines, a graphic novel of sorts, related to pain.  I picked up some valuable insights from that small book:

• Essentially, pain is the nervous system’s response to something not feeling safe
• Honing my interoceptive awareness (noticing my body from the inside) can have positive outcomes to the chronic pain-body relationship
• Painful thoughts/words/beliefs only heighten the pain response.  Changing the language around the pain can be useful
• It’s important to be creative, unique and to try new things in the healing process

So I’ve been working through those insights in my personal healing journey and approaching it from different angles, trying new things:

• My daily meditation practice oftentimes includes a simple noticing of where my neck is positioned in relation to the rest of my spine, taking a journey and picturing what it’s structure looks and feels like from the inside.  Initially, I observed brittle concrete pillars for the bones, fascia and musculature.  Now I often picture my hand grabbing a warm wet cloth and gently washing away the layers of concrete, washing away the layers of tension and immobility.
• I repeat soft reminders for my neck and shoulders, letting them know “I am/we are safe”.
• When practicing yoga, I’m giving myself permission to use as many props as I need, to alter the posture or move into something else entirely, whether I’m practicing alone or in a class setting.  I’m also giving myself permission to ease off of other movement practices I enjoy, such as running, and listening to my body’s need to move at a more relaxed pace.  Afternoon walks to pick up the kids from school is proving therapeutic.
• I’m exploring my creative side through writing, singing or simply speaking my truth in an effort to heal on an energetic level.  Because, if you’re familiar with chakra philosophies, the throat chakra = creativity and self expression.

And I’m feeling better…some days….except when I’m not… I think it’s working…some days…except when it doesn’t… This chronic pain has been quite the humbling experience! It’s lead me to the realization that there are some things you just can’t control and the solution is not always going to be quickly evident.  So, there needs to be a careful balance of deep, attentive listening and a soft, kind responsiveness to the body and what it is asking for.  Day-to-day it might not be perfect but I’m also learning that is ok too.  Because, if this experience has given me anything, it is a better understanding of living in my body.  And, up until this point, that relationship may have been what has eluded me all along.

The post When Healing is Elusive appeared first on Define Me Wellness.