I recently got a night guard to help me refrain from clenching my teeth while sleeping. Chronic jaw, neck, and shoulder pain had not been helped by some of the other interventions I tried. So the night guard was the next logical step. Four weeks into wearing it religiously every night I had gained some relief. However, the jaw pain was still there.

Fast forward to four weeks later… I’m back at the dentist’s office for a routine check up and cleaning. “The night guard has helped, I’m not experiencing as much pain as before, but still there is jaw pain”, I tell my dental hygienist as I lie back in the chair. She proceeds to tell me I might be clenching during the day too! Apparently it is really common in today’s desk dwelling culture, along with global feelings of stress, uncertainty, and productivity pressures, to be constantly contracting the jaw muscles and clenching the teeth. So much so that people are now wearing corrective mouth gear almost 24-7  to help remedy the problem.

In between her cleaning my mouth, I chuckled, “That’s kinda comical.” Instead of questioning and trying to address the root-source of the problem (i.e.: stress), we slap a band-aid (in this case, a mouth guard) on it. We look towards quick and immediate external fixes to cure longstanding and internal (personal) challenges.

About stress resilience

So that visit with my dental hygienist really got me thinking. Resilience, as defined by Merriam-Webster, is:

“an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change”

It brought me back to this TED Talk by Kelly McGonigal. Basically, she proposes that we need to change our relationship to stress instead of stressing about how to rid ourselves of it. Because removing stress completely from our lives is an impossible task. Subsequently, since viewing that talk a few years ago, I’ve changed my language regarding this topic from a theme of stress management to stress resilience.

But Michelle, you ask, what does this have to do with mouth guards and jaw pain? Well, maybe if we changed our relationship to stress, the jaw wouldn’t need a piece of molded acrylic to handle the weight of our anxieties and overwhelm all the time, day-and-night. Perhaps, if we:

• Become more aware of our stressors
• Meet them head on (with compassion)
• To understand how we usually react (physical, emotional or otherwise) to those stressors

Then, we might find new ways to effectively be with stress. In this way, the stress could be an opportunity to become more resilient.

An Embodied Response

When I reflected back on what could have been the stress that showed up for me as musculoskeletal pain, I realized it was felt pretty soon after I started back to school, after a 20+ year “hiatus” (more on that here). Clenching my teeth and contracting my fascial muscles was my embodied response to the many worries (and realities) of a major life change. Making that connection now has me considering the ways I can adapt to the challenges of being a mature student.

First, I’ve acknowledged that, although I made a good (for me) choice to become a student again, it’s natural for me to be stressed. Stress is inevitable, in this circumstance and in life. The question is:

How am I going to respond so that the stress does not take over? 

Bodies are amazing in so many ways. They have the ability to take on all kinds of stress and to bounce back from adversity. Also fascinating is that our bodies tell us when enough is enough. I’m choosing to heed the call of what my body needs:

• Do I need more rest?
• Does the jaw need some gentle movement, restorative yoga or self-massage?
• Do I need to do more conscious and relaxing breathing?
• Does my body need to move more vigorously (i.e.: running or swimming) so as to move the tension out?

I’m still using the mouth guard at night. My body still needs that support, which is totally ok. But I’d prefer not to wear a mouth guard during the day too! Instead, I want to:

• Practice being more connected to my body’s experience of stress
• Kindly acknowledge that stress is part of life but I don’t have to succumb to it completely
• Continue to use my movement practices as a tool for self-care and bouncing back from stressful moments

Any kind of physical pain is a signal to listen, instead of ignoring the pain altogether or putting a proverbial band-aid on it. Stress might be a way for us to build awareness, find strength and practice self-care.

The post Chronic Pain & Stress: A Gateway to Embodied Living appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

Over the last several years, there’s been a lot of talk about loving yourself in the body-positive movement. And while that’s a wonderful notion, loving ourselves when we’re at war with our body can feel like an impossible task. Or, maybe it just feels pointless in that we’re setting ourselves up for failure, disappointment. Furthermore, when we’re experiencing the following things:

• Chronic pain
• Chronic illness
• Trauma, or
• Stigma for a body that does not fit the cultural ideal…

The act of self-love can seem unfathomable. In other words:

Self-love in trying times can feel like a bunch of BS!

Awhile back I was on the “you gotta practice self-love” train too. That was until my train got derailed. Well, I’ve learned the hard way that chronic pain and illness can be physically/emotionally/spiritually painful. I hated my body way more than I loved it. That is for sure!

What does it mean to “neutralize the body experience?

However, I also now realize that body hatred is a form of body combat. And that kind of in-fighting only wires us for more stress. Which then only serves to keep or amplify dis-ease and unrest in both body and mind.

So what if we could rest in a space within us that didn’t have to be loving? Or hating?

What if we could rest in a place within ourselves that witnessed the whole body experience? The mistakes? The successes? The limitations? The abilities? The good? The bad? The right? The wrong?

And what might happen if we explored all these things in a state of presence and objectivity?

Finally, is it even possible to reach neutral ground with your thoughts/feelings/beliefs about your body? Well, I think so! Herein lies one of my favourite practices – Yoga Nidra…

What is Yoga Nidra?

Yoga Nidra is a form of guided relaxation, also known as “awakened sleep” or deep conscious rest. While the body is in a relaxed and still position, participants navigate the thoughts, beliefs and emotions of the fluctuating mind.

Yoga Nidra puts a pause on the high stress experience of living in an injured, traumatized or stigmatized body. The parasympathetic nervous system takes over to facilitate a rest and digest state.

And just by being in this rest and digest mode, we physiologically bring our bodies into a neutral zone without having to force anything else (loving, hateful or otherwise).

A Yoga Nidra practice typically includes the following 2 things:

1. An intention that is affirming, action oriented and in the present tense
2. Exploring both extremes of various experiences, attempting to experience them at the same time

A Yoga Nidra Practice to Neutralize the Body Experience

Wanna try? I recorded a brief Yoga Nidra practice that I’m happy to share here. Before you begin:

1. Remove potential distractions
2. Find a space that is quiet and where you won’t be disturbed
3. Setup in a comfortable position on the floor or chair

Here is your guided Yoga Nidra Session (20 minutes):

***Curious to try more Yoga Nidra and other relaxation strategies? Check the schedule for our next round of Small Group Restorative sessions and for registration details. Or, if group settings are not your thing, Michelle is booking 1:1 private sessions also. Contact us to set up your complimentary phone consult. 

The post Neutralizing the Body Experience: From self-love to body hatred and everything in between appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

A Full Day Dedicated to Women’s Health, Empowerment & Self-Care

Most of all, this is a day for connection and revitalizing your commitment to your well-being journey for 2017 and beyond.  It’s going to be refreshing and fun! And we hope you’ll join us.  As an extra incentive to get you registered….

It’s Contest Giveaway Time!

Part of our women’s health retreat involves a practice in self-massage.  And we’ll be using my go-to resources with the Yoga Tune Up® Therapy Balls.  Establishing a daily self-massage routine can help with:

• Relieving and eliminating pain
• Managing stress
• Enhancing the mind-body connection

Because I’m a big “ball-iever” in the power of self-care as health-care, I want you to be able to take what you learned home with you.  So, if you register by 11:59pm Monday, Jan 16th, your name will be entered into a draw to win a Yoga Tune Up® Therapy Balls kit.  Valued at almost $150, the winner will receive the following:

• Set of Originals, in netted tote
• 1 Alpha
• 1 Coregeous
• Plus, a private 1:1 customized “roll-it-out” session with me, Michelle

Another event (and giveaway) like this isn’t going to come along often! Sunday, January 22nd is going to be a fabulous day with a peaceful setting, delicious food and a room full of women celebrating and empowering one another.

To join us, simply follow this link for registration. This once a year event is only open to the first 20 registered.

The post Jan 22nd Retreat for Women’s Health, Empowerment & Self-Care! Agenda & Contest Giveaway!!! appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

Seems like the holidays are wrapping up and a new year is upon us.  It’s the best time to prioritize you and find simple ways to take good care of your whole self (read: mind, body, spirit).  That’s why I’m excited to be co-hosting this Nourished Body day-long retreat on January 22nd! Past participants say it’s introspective, inspiring, valuable and fun! And this year’s event promises to be all that and more.

Tucked away in a farm setting in Uxbridge, you’ll learn new and interesting practices around food, movement and health.  Here are just a few highlights…

Exploring an alternative to the diet and deprivation cycle

Our relationship with food can be complicated and frustrating.  But it shouldn’t be.  And it doesn’t have to be.  Kori Kostka, Registered Dietitian, will have you thinking differently about eating through:

1. Ditching the rules and restriction (or putting them aside, at least for one day)
2. Discovering ways to identify hunger and fullness cues
3. And putting theory into practice with a fully-catered mindful eating lunch

Restore your body and nervous systems through movement:

Since food and exercise go hand-in-hand when dieting, the usual approach to physical activity probably leaves us more disconnected from our bodies.  And just like with food, it doesn’t have to be this way.  Therefore, Michelle Pitman (that’s me!) will also have you thinking and relating to your body differently with:

1. Body sensing from a place of curiosity and no judgment
2. Self massage techniques for pain relief
3. Restorative yoga as a gentle and embodied experience

As a result of these movement practices, you will feel deep relaxation and a better understanding of your body’s needs.

Finally, discover how you can take charge of your health

It all comes together with a candid and kind conversation with Nurse Practitioner Claudia Mariano.  You will get the facts about the health concerns that matter most to you as a woman, from an expert.  And then learn what you can do to prevent, heal and thrive through:

1. Practicing mindfulness for women’s health, at various life stages
2. Discovering new tips for taking care of your skin
3. And, most importantly, determining how to get what you want out of life

Sunday, January 22nd is going to be a fabulous day with a peaceful setting, delicious food and a room full of women celebrating and empowering one another.  To join us, simply follow this link for registration.  And please sign up soon to avoid disappointment.  This once a year event is only open to the first 20 registered.

Women’s Wellness & Leadership Retreat
Eat, Play and Be Mindful

The post Women’s Wellness & Leadership 1 Day Retreat appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

Create a movement diary and take inventory on a typical workday of the total hours spent sitting, from the moment you get out of bed in the morning until you go to sleep.  This includes time spent at the dining table, watching tv, your commute, etc.

Remember to approach this self-assessment with honest and kind curiosity; no judgment or trying to fix anything.

Step 2: If possible, find a quiet place to reset

If you are at the workplace and are in a cubicle, see if a meeting room is available and setup for some Constructive Rest:

1. Lie down on the floor with knees bent, feet on the floor
2. Support your head and neck with a folded blanket, beach towel or pillow. The head and neck should be supported in such a way that the sides of the neck feel long, yet comfortable, and the chin is drawing down slightly towards the collar-bones
3. Walk your feet out to either side and bring the knees to touch
4. Place your hands on your belly and close down the eyes to help turn your attention inwards
5. Take 2 – 5 minutes to focus on your body’s natural inhale and exhale pattern
6. Play with equal ratio (1:1) breathing, where the inhale and exhale are of the same duration/count (this breath practice helps to balance the nervous system)

Step 3: Reclaim your seat

Once you have spent some time in Constructive Rest, you are ready to return to your desk with a calm mind and relaxed musculature.  Use that body awareness to reclaim your seat with intention:

1. Find your sitting bones, the two bony protrusions on either cheek just above the hamstrings
2. As you bend your knees, shift your hips back and sit on the edge of your chair, on your sitting bones as opposed to sitting on your sacrum
3. Rather than forcing your spine upright, wedge a pillow between the back of your chair and your spine for support or…
4. Shift your hips back until your spine is supported by the back of your chair (you should still be sitting on your sitting bones)

If you are looking for more strategies on creating optimal well-being in and out of the office for yourself, co-workers or staff, consider scheduling a Define Me Workplace Wellness workshop (such as this one) for your next company event or Lunch n Learn.

The post Reinventing the Afternoon Coffee-Break, Part II appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

What does that do for your body? What does that do for your overall well-being? Here are my Top 3 issues with desk dwelling:

1. Holding any one position for long takes its toll on the body 

Some say “sitting is the new smoking” but I find that to be more fear-mongering than helpful.  Sitting isn’t going to give you COPD or cancer,  so let’s not be so dramatic! The truth is the average desk dweller spends about 14 – 15 hours per day seated.  This mundane and long-held position creates imbalances in the body that can lead to hip dysfunction, low back pain, chronic neck pain and shoulder issues.

2. Breathing is not optimal when the body is hunched over

Your diaphragm, a key muscle in respiration, sits underneath your lungs, housed in your abdominal cavity.  When you are hunched over your desk all day the diaphragm is compressed, limiting your breath from moving into the full capacity of your lungs.  Your system compensates by shortening the breath, which in turn stimulates your sympathetic nervous system (aka: stress response, fight or flight).

If you are working at an office chances are your nervous system is on high alert already with multi-tasking and tight deadlines to try to manage.  You don’t need any more “help” triggering fight or flight!

3. Long bouts of sitting summons the Energy Vampire 

Those rounded shoulders and head jutting forward not only create dysfunction in the physical body but they drain you mentally and emotionally too.  From a psycho-emotional standpoint, our shoulders carry all of our worries and burdens.  Continued sitting and leaning in to our work reinforce the feeling of being dumped on, weighted down with more stuff, which has a way of de-energizing and probably making you less productive.

So what if we tweaked the afternoon routine and sitting for what should actually be a real 15 minute break from work and replace it with a variety of practices and positions that better support our productivity and well-being?

Soon to follow: More on what you can do in my next segment on Reinventing the Afternoon Coffee Break, Part II.

The post Reinventing the Afternoon Coffee-Break, Part I appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

This is your opportunity to try Reiki – one of many subtle body modalities that is known to reduce the stress response, providing relaxation and alignment of the whole system (mind and body and soul).

An in-person session involves the client lying on a massage table, fully clothed, while the practitioner places hands directly on or hovering over different points of the body.  Results typically experienced during and after a session (as told by my clients), may be as follows:

• Decreased pain and/or tension
• Improved inner body awareness
• A sense of being grounded
• More feelings of being calm, at peace
• Less feelings of overwhelm/depression/anxiety

Pay What Feels Best means you pay what feels appropriate for you; no minimum amount required, no obligation.  In fact, payment is discrete with a drop box for you to place your designated amount without the potentially awkward moment of money exchanging hands.

Sessions run in duration anywhere between 30 – 90 minutes.

Distance healing also available upon request.

Contact Michelle to schedule an appointment.

The post Reiki Appointments Now Available, Pay What Feels Best appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

There was a lot I had to change and experiment with in order to get to this space. First I had to…

• Allow myself the time
• Set boundaries
• Say no
• Let go of needing to please everyone
• Let go of needing do things perfectly
• Try new things

…in order to feel better in my mindbody. It’s funny how quickly and sneakily old behaviours return when you’re struggling.

I also needed to share extra cuddles, downtime and tears with my family and say sorry (A LOT) for when my pain, fatigue and frustration came in the way of my kids’ and hubby’s happiness and well-being.

I realize that I carry a lot of privilege to be able to have done all of the above, to have been able to put my well-being ahead of everything else.

If you’re struggling I hope this post inspires you in some small way to do what you can for your own self-care in a way that feels appropriate for your mindbody, your circumstances and your experience. Health, well-being and healing is so subjective. Honour what you need/don’t need, do/don’t do what resonates for you.

While I’m not entirely feeling well, I am feeling better enough. It’s time to get back to writing and launching! It’s time to get back to business!

The post When Healing Turns a Corner appeared first on Define Me Wellness.

• Frustrated that there isn’t one day where I wake up in the morning without feeling the pain
• Frustrated that I can’t turn my head without turning my whole torso when changing lanes while driving
• Frustrated that I am missing out on moving my body in ways that are challenging, yet enjoyable, for me
• Frustrated that I am not healing quick enough
• Frustrated that, ultimately, healing seems to be eluding me

I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be a complainer.  I realize that I am privileged to have access and financial means to be able to get help.  I also realize that my pain pales in comparison to those that live with chronic disease such as fibromyalgia, arthritis, etc., where pain is a constant teeter-totter of sensation with no known cure.  I don’t mean to minimize those experiences or suggest that with the “right” action plan, that pain can all but go away.  On the contrary…

We all, at some point in our lives, whether it be physical, mental, emotional or otherwise, experience pain in varying degrees.  Is it not intertwined with the human condition? I share this as a personal reflection of my well-being journey, as opposed to dictating a specific way (i.e.: my way) will work for you.  Anyway, back to the chiropractor visit…

So I asked my chiropractor “Do you have other patients whose bodies are stubborn, taking a long time to heal?”.  The tone in my question demonstrated my impatience.  I was agitated and angry that pain had it’s own agenda and I didn’t seem to have a say in the how, when or whether my body would heal.  I knew her answer would be yes but I wanted to feel validated that I wasn’t the only one who felt this way and that at some point I would feel better and could get on with things.

So we continued to talk about how the experience of pain and healing is so unique to each and every one of us.  It can also be a challenging and lengthy process.  Pain, it turns out, is so much more than just “x” issue caused by “y” pain.  I can’t remember the specifics of what she said but it had an impact on me.  In that moment I realized I was looking for a definitive answer when there wasn’t one – a prescription, a training plan, a project map, a course of action that would rid me of my discomfort.  A-ha!!! That was my shifting moment! Maybe I needed to sit with the discomfort, listen and dialogue with my body.  Maybe I needed to let go of the quest for perfect healing and meet my body as it was, with a dose of curiosity, self-acceptance and compassion.

I recently read this short book “Pain Is Really Strange” by Steven Haines, a graphic novel of sorts, related to pain.  I picked up some valuable insights from that small book:

• Essentially, pain is the nervous system’s response to something not feeling safe
• Honing my interoceptive awareness (noticing my body from the inside) can have positive outcomes to the chronic pain-body relationship
• Painful thoughts/words/beliefs only heighten the pain response.  Changing the language around the pain can be useful
• It’s important to be creative, unique and to try new things in the healing process

So I’ve been working through those insights in my personal healing journey and approaching it from different angles, trying new things:

• My daily meditation practice oftentimes includes a simple noticing of where my neck is positioned in relation to the rest of my spine, taking a journey and picturing what it’s structure looks and feels like from the inside.  Initially, I observed brittle concrete pillars for the bones, fascia and musculature.  Now I often picture my hand grabbing a warm wet cloth and gently washing away the layers of concrete, washing away the layers of tension and immobility.
• I repeat soft reminders for my neck and shoulders, letting them know “I am/we are safe”.
• When practicing yoga, I’m giving myself permission to use as many props as I need, to alter the posture or move into something else entirely, whether I’m practicing alone or in a class setting.  I’m also giving myself permission to ease off of other movement practices I enjoy, such as running, and listening to my body’s need to move at a more relaxed pace.  Afternoon walks to pick up the kids from school is proving therapeutic.
• I’m exploring my creative side through writing, singing or simply speaking my truth in an effort to heal on an energetic level.  Because, if you’re familiar with chakra philosophies, the throat chakra = creativity and self expression.

And I’m feeling better…some days….except when I’m not… I think it’s working…some days…except when it doesn’t… This chronic pain has been quite the humbling experience! It’s lead me to the realization that there are some things you just can’t control and the solution is not always going to be quickly evident.  So, there needs to be a careful balance of deep, attentive listening and a soft, kind responsiveness to the body and what it is asking for.  Day-to-day it might not be perfect but I’m also learning that is ok too.  Because, if this experience has given me anything, it is a better understanding of living in my body.  And, up until this point, that relationship may have been what has eluded me all along.

The post When Healing is Elusive appeared first on Define Me Wellness.